Coaching and Mentoring - the Gentle Art of Reflection

University, MSc/PGDip Advanced Coaching, competencies, 1. Continuous reflection. Sigh. I do believe in it actually, it's just doing it. Hence my mission, to blog more. It's a way of reflecting. I've never been much into blogging although I do like reading the posts of those people who I like if it's a subject I'm interested in. For me I have some mental blocks. I see it as a rather self indulgent process, who wants to read anything I write anyway?

So how to make it interesting, at least for myself! This is what I have to try to achieve.

Reflection is something that has been harped on about in all circles for ages... And I do get it. It's a very useful learning tool. I think my resistance is that I find it common sense. Of course we are continuously reflecting on our actions and our decisions, and sometimes we have to write reports or reviews depending on our line of work. Putting things into boxes and being told I have to call it something specific or do it in a certain way has never really been my style. So maybe writing a few posts will help me reflect more, I've heard it's good practice ;) as long as I don't approach it like I do assignments - the only time under the stairs will get sorted, the kitchen cupboards get a face lift and the kettle is constantly being boiled.

There is lots of info out there on reflection, written much more succinctly than I ever could. I do advocate everyone taking a little time out, in whatever capacity, to at least look at things a little differently.

http://www.mheducation.co.uk/openup/chapters/9780335244010.pdf

IBJJF European Open Lisbon 2015

The Euros for me this year seemed like the ideal opportunity to test myself after a good showing at the London Open 2014. Also I know that a good few others from the gym and from CFS would be competing so I'd be able to watch them and support them as well. Training was going well until the lurgy struck over Christmas and New Year and I was still struggling a bit by the time the Euros came around. However, I was determined to go out and fight well and hopefully bring back a medal. 

Myself and Kieren arrived on the Tuesday and met Dan and Fran who had already settled into the rather quirky Lisbon apartment. I think the last time I slept on a bunk bed was when I was about 6! It was good having a kitchen to cook in though as it meant I could cook my own food -  very useful when maintaining a specific weight and the Lidl round the corner meant it was cheap as well. Wednesday would see Fran and Kieren compete so they went to bed early whilst I sprawled on the coach watching a film. Ritchie had also turned up and joined me in the bunk bed room. 

A nice early start the next day saw us get to the sports hall for 9 with Ritchie competing first followed by Kieren and Fran. It was around 7 that evening before everyone was done so a pretty long day. I was impressed with the number of people entered and the number of spectators as well, the atmosphere was definitely buzzing and it gave me a taste of what was to come on Friday.  I didn't go to the comp on Thursday as I wanted to rest up and I was changing hotels as well. This meant I could go and meet little Liam as he got of the metro and show him where the gaff was.  As a reward he took me for a coffee and ate a custard tart for me. That evening I was nice and relaxed in my own room at the hotel and watched a film before going to bed. I didn't have to rush the next morning so took my time and got to the sports hall about 11' in time to see Chip competing. He did great and won his first two matches.  I was pretty nervous but there were a few people around to chat to so that helped distract me. When I knew I would be up soon I went to change and had a bit of a warm up although space was pretty limited. At check in I did have to change my Gi, they were strict on the rules, so I was glad I put two in. I didn't know who I was fighting so my idea was to go out with as much focus as possible and try and do what I'd been doing in practice. When you've been on the scene a bit you might have a better idea about your opponent and be able to put specific game plans in place but I was there for the experience more than anything. Stepping out on the mat I felt good, I'd managed my weight well, I was hydrated and pretty calm. Looking back I think I might have been a bit too calm and maybe needed to be a bit more ge'ed up. The match was quite fast paced, faster than I expected, and I don't think I was quite prepared for that. I started well with a take down then struggled to control position although I did manage to almost pass guard. I'm still getting used to BJJ, especially competition style, and have some habits from judo that don't work well for BJJ. We spend much less time working on controlling the position in judo, unless it's side control! And don't have as long to work on control and progression in a match so it is different. After another takedown I was 4 points and an advantage ahead but got caught with an armbar from guard with less than a minute left. I wasn't happy with the result but was happy with the overall experience and stayed to watch her win the division. Then it was time to kick back and relax and get that custard tart I'd been waiting for! It was awesome watching some of the other gym members compete and being surrounded by BJJ geeks helped me really get a deeper appreciation and understanding. When it comes to competing, some people may judge you on whether you win or lose, but I'm not doing it for them, I'm doing it for me and for the people I'm close to so it doesn't really matter. However..... Next time..... ;) 

Moving on

It's been almost 2 years now since the Games in London and a couple of months since my last judo competition. Transitioning from full-time athlete into not being one has not always been an easy process and there's a lot of stuff out there that talks about the sort of limbo land that people find themselves in.. Despite the fact I've done it before - I buggered off to Thailand last time - this is different as I've remained very close to 'the game' so I think coming to accept where I am has been a bit harder. I am grateful that I've had great support and plenty of opportunities to explore different avenues as well as having some pretty major life events. People can't help but place labels on other people - so and so the bank manager, so and so the teacher, so and so the judo athlete, as it's our way of identifying each other. It was always pretty hard to try and explain I did judo for a living, it was often met with a confused expression. Changing jobs it seems you immediately change your identity. One former athlete, who I met through working with the Dame Kelly Holmes legacy trust helped explain it, he said for a long time he still introduced himself or was introduced as Adam the swimmer. Now he's comfortable with being Adam who works for the DKH Legacy trust and Adam, so an so's husband. I'm not sure I'll ever have the 9-5 but I am happy with being Sophie the coach, and Sophie the athlete mentor, and I'm especially happy with my nest and being settled for what I see as the long term where I am, although it's still a relatively new concept, this putting down roots. As an athlete stepping away from the competitive scene it seems at first you only know a lot about one thing - but ifs possible to learn all the time. New adventures and new experiences are here already and I'm hungry for more.

To compete or not to compete, that is the question. Whether it is far healthier in the mind....
Having just returned from the Belgian Ladies Open competition in Arlon where I battled my way through 7 bruising matches to finish 5th I am giving my body a day or two of respite although tomorrow I will be back at the gym and judo and preparing for the Austrian Open in two weeks time. Judo is an unforgiving sport at the top competition level, having no set 'season' and an Olympic qualification system that means people are constantly competing for points. Add to that the sheer physicality of the sport and the training demands; add to that the strength in depth (usually) of the competition across the world: well it does take a certain kind of mentality to actually want to compete at that level. I've been doing it for years now, was indoctrinated into the competitive side of the sport as a young child so it's all pretty standard for me. However, outside of that smallish sphere it might seem less comprehensible. Teaching judo to kids I rarely emphasise the winning part of the games we play and don't put too much emphasis on results. Teaching a beginner adult class the emphasis is on efficient movement and technique; judo for judos' sake. Coaching a class of regular competitors, the emphasis is on tactics, gamesmanship and effectiveness in a match. Some people are natural competitors; they have a winning instinct and thrive in a high pressure environment. Other people crumble under the pressure and cannot produce their best. In judo there are lots of very skilful 'randori' players who can throw the best in the world in practice but can't work within the confines of a competition situation. I think I'm somewhere in-between. I don't always have to win at everything and I do believe in taking part for the sake of it. At the same time I don't like to be told 'no' or 'you can't'. So if someone is stopping me getting what I want then I'm gonna fight them! The fighter in me comes out more when the chips are down. I also like the idea of testing myself; putting what I've learnt or trained at to the test. And I think this is where sport and exercise can crossover and co-exist. If people can be encouraged to enjoy learning a sport and see benefits in terms of increasing skill level as well as fitness I.e. test themselves a little, then sport in the traditional sense could appeal to a lot more people. Doing something like judo is really functional and can cover every aspect of health, fitness and well-being. There are plenty of other sports/activities like this and there really is something for everyone.